Dear Abby: Keeping heavy guest off the antiques

Dear Abby I have a set of Chippendale-style dining chairs that are more than years old They are of sentimental value to me because I grew up with them Not long ago at considerable expense I had them repaired and reupholstered My husband s son-in-law Isaac whom I love very much weighs between and pounds When the family is dining he uses one of the chairs They are not intended to hold such weight My husband and I agree that we should buy a heavy-duty chair that can accommodate Isaac s weight However I don t know how to convey to Isaac that the new chair is for him without causing offense or hurt feelings Do you have a suggestion Treading Lightly Dear Treading Your husband should explain the prospective difficulty to his daughter so SHE can point out to her husband that a special dining room chair has been acquired for him to use at family dinners Dear Abby My friend Alma has a handicapped parking permit I never questioned her why she has it We regularly go for long walks and she seems perfectly able-bodied Alma did share with me once that she got the tag after an accident left her with particular intermittent long-term pain She disclosed preponderance days she doesn t need the accessible parking and doesn t use it but that when her pain flares up it s helpful to be able to utilize a handicapped parking space However I have been with Alma in situations where there is limited parking and she suggests using a handicapped space I m uncomfortable taking a space away from someone who may need it but also uncomfortable questioning whether Alma necessities it or if it s just for convenience What is the proper etiquette here Empathetic in Texas Dear Empathetic The proper etiquette would be to tell your friend Alma with a smile that unless she s having pain that day you would prefer to park a little farther away in a regular parking spot Dear Abby My son works two jobs and takes college classes His deadbeat girlfriend doesn t work They broke up briefly and she moved in with another guy but he refused to encouragement her so she got back with my son again She knows I have her number so we do not get along which puts a strain on my relationship with my son He deserves a better life partner but he doesn t see it that way Is there anything I can do to wake him up Plain As Day in Washington Dear Plain Your son is young and hasn t had time to gain much experience about romantic relationships If he didn t pick up on the fact that his girlfriend left him because she thought she had identified another meal ticket and that she returned only when the guy refused to aid her nothing you can say that you haven t already disclosed I m sure will dissuade him from having to learn a painful lesson on his own Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren also known as Jeanne Phillips and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips Contact Dear Abby at www DearAbby com or P O Box Los Angeles CA